Peter and I were golfing buddies for years until one day he started asking me about my compensation.
I refused to tell him for weeks until he mentioned he was in a tough situation, negotiating a package with a potential new employer and sought my advice as someone several years his senior. When I did, he quieted down, walked to the next hole and smacked his driver down the pipe. As weeks turned into months, I realized he no longer pinged me to play golf. Peter turned Hs dont tell anyone and I later found out that the reason why he never took the new job was because he countered them so high based on what he heard from me that they pulled the offer.
Peter blames me for not getting the job and not making the money he feels he deserves to make. I have no control over what the potential suitor was willing to pay so why is it my fault? He asked me to be his mentor when he first graduated from college, and his competitive drive drove him overboard.
He compares everything from Hs dont tell anyone to property with everybody. As an example, he purchased a two year old Aston Martin Vanquish around his 30th birthday. All he had to do was buy a two year old Honda Civic and it would blow away what I was driving and most of our circle since we take the bus!
It was an absolute mistake revealing my income to him.
In fact, perhaps this is why I so often wear baseball caps, so I can be left alone to do my own thing. We could have come up with a strategy for negotiation, and use my figure as a realistic Hs dont tell anyone point for further talks with his potential new employer. If for whatever reason, you just have to reveal your income to others, use this guideline to decide whether you should or not:. Reimburse the occasional failure and set up some type of safety net fund or charity fund to help.
If you must share info given the other party has bared their soul, talk in percentages and temper them while you are at it. Look around at the most financially successful people out there. They are secure with themselves and understand the upsides of keeping their finances private. In addition to better money oversight, run your investments through their award-winning Investment Checkup tool to see exactly how much you are paying in fees.
It used to cost a fortune and a lot of employees to start Hs dont tell anyone business. Brand yourself online, connect with like-minded people, find new consulting gigs, and potentially make a good amount of income online one day by selling your product or recommending other great products.
A real income statement example from a blogger. Look at all the income possibilities. I agree at work it is mostly downside and little upside. A senior colleague who is 15 years older than me and very accomplished technically is making less than me and did not negotiate a bonus.
The head of the company told him that none of the senior staff get a bonus but he partially lied Hs dont tell anyone he qualified it as a 13th month bonus.
I regularly hear the colleague gripe about this since there was a promise made to him more than 1 year ago that he will get a variable bonus. I will not tell him the entire situation because I know it will upset him and perhaps he will be angry at me for keeping it quiet so long and then telling him.
Ignorance truly is bliss.
I would rather know a range than a specific number, bc even one dollar more or less can cause tension! I read this article too late. We live in Ct and they live in the South so it probably amounts to the same. Originally, we revealed our income because we were excited to have jobs and then every promotion thereafter.
It was a celebration for us and we were sharing our happiness. Recently, we paid off our student loans and finally have some room for our wants. Also recently, our relationship dynamic with his parents has changed. They expect us to take them out to restaurants and pay the bill every time when we visit. This Thanksgiving they asked us to pay them bucks in electricity bill as the usage went up when we were visiting.
They Hs dont tell anyone if we make x dollars, then we should spend the entire x dollars.
My FIL recently revealed what he wanted for Christmas a gadget that cost more than our entire xmas budget and I knew then that telling them about our promotion was a bad idea. I think that revealing income and the job itself to some family members or friends can be bad EVEN if you earn very little.
They judge you based on money without even realizing it. My story is this. I earn a below average income. Most of Hs dont tell anyone family members earn two-three times more, and some five-six times more. I was always glad for them. It seems they are so lucky. But I would expect them to love me for me and appreciate me at least because I am financially self-sufficient. No matter how little I earn, I always have an emergency cushion. On top of that, I love my job and yet still look for other better opportunities no matter how many years it takes.
I love my money and never complain that it is too little.
In fact, I feel like I have more than enough to live very comfortably. So, I tend to save money easily. I simply wanted to share my happiness with the family because right now I work as a cleaning person for a company that pays the highest income BUT the highest of all the lowest incomes. And i did share. So, when I shared my story Hs dont tell anyone them about my job, all I got back was excessive amount of pity and sorry, almost with tears.
All those comments showed me that they value me based on how much I make. I wanted support and encouragement, but I got pity and discouragement.